Coding Feels Fun Again

In building my new site, I healed my inner coder (a bit).

05/31/2026

Coding for the first time was magical. It was challenging, and I sometimes wanted to pull my hair out. But when the code executed as I intended, it felt like fireworks.

But I struggled a lot with being a programmer, especially when I entered the workplace. Impostor syndrome became my identity, and it was hard to shake. I was constantly comparing myself to others, which only fed my insecurity. And with the rise of AI, I felt threatened. How could I not when everyone around me was asking what my next career move would be, now that my current job was “dead”?

I lost the joy and wonder I had originally found in coding, and it affected me in all aspects of my life. Sadly, so much of my identity was tied to my career, and I felt lost without that tether.

Then the universe helped me out — it made me take a break and step back from coding. I spent over one year considering new career paths, thinking about what I wanted to do with my life. Interestingly enough, I landed on law, and I will now be attending law school in the fall.

And now, after stepping back and choosing a new career for myself, I have been able to come back to coding on my own terms. And it has been lovely.

There is something special about doing something because you want to do it, not because you have to. Coding and development have become magical to me again because I can now learn and create at my own pace. And I now know that the projects I put out do not define my worth. I can be a creative and enjoy the process, something I hadn’t been able to do for a long time.

Building this website is a testament to my healing relationship with programming. I’ve even improved my relationship with AI, finding it a great tool to help with tasks like debugging. And I believe I have enough love restored to continue creating through this amazing medium. I so often start projects and never finish them. When I do finish a project, I usually don’t believe it’s worth putting out there. But now I hope to showcase everything I make, even if it’s not something I personally think is fantastic.

I am using this blog as a platform to share my ideas, share the great ideas of others, and just ruminate on cool things. I am planning to post once a week to help develop a habit, and I believe I will learn so much in the process. And topics will not be limited to tech & development; I am a future law student after all. Besides, I don’t only love coding.

I have an RSS feed if you want to follow along on your feed reader. Eventually it would be great to start a newsletter, but for now I am excited about the blog!

If you read this to the end, thank you so much. I hope you will come back in the subsequent weeks. And I hope you find joy in something, whether it be work or a hobby, in your own life ❤️